Cranky Fat Feminist Speaks

liberal feminist from the south who ran away to college in the mid-west, and quickly retreated back after my four years were up. trying to save the world one picture book at a time; attempting to live healthier to lose weight, but without giving up beer. challenging the idea that “big is beautiful” as well as what I’ve learned and experienced about women, gender, and feminism from my time in college as well as my time in West Africa. pissed about the apathy of the world, ready to create change one mind at a time.

I'd love any comments you'd like to share! And as always, I'd love for you to click on an ad when you're done reading, it's a simple free way for you to give money towards my student loans!


Saturday, September 26, 2015

[cranky] goodbye Boehner

I have NOTHING positive to say about Speaker of the House John Boehner. He just announced that he is not only resigning his position as Speaker but he's retiring from roughly 20 years in Congress. His home district in Ohio is solidly Republican, so the Republican Governor John Kasich (yep, that one running for the Presidential nomination) should face no opposition to appointing another party line Republican to replace him.

While I won't miss the fake spray tan sour face of Boehner standing in the back of countless photo-ops, I am worried abut what face will replace his. Boehner originally planned to give up his Speakership at the end of 2014, but Eric Cantor's humiliating loss at re-election prompted him to stay on. (Remember -- Eric Cantor so arrogantly neglected to campaign in his run off that he lost his nomination and wasn't even n the final ballot.) Boehner once compared being Speaker to being a prisoner in an interview with Politico. Clearly, he won't be shedding any tears on November 1st when he walk out of Congress for good.

But why leave now?

Thursday, September 17, 2015

[feminist] Reflection: The Business of Being Born


The first startling statistic of childbirth in America is that less than 8% of births are attended by a midwife. In Europe and Japan, midwives attend an average of 70% of births.


Startling stats, part two. The USA has the number one worst maternal death rate and the second worst infant mortality rate in the developed world.


Perhaps this makes more sense when we realize that in other countries midwives deliver babies, not doctors. Obstetricians are always available or on call in case of delivery emergencies. Obstetricians don’t do the majority of baby delivery in any country except the USA.


What’s the big difference?


Capitalism.


Hospitals in the USA are businesses, and businesses are all about increased traffic and turnover. Pregnant women in -- baby out -- minimum recovery time -- goodbye. Any time additions lose money.



In an effort to keep turnover high and profits higher, many women are nearly immediately administered pitocin to induce stronger contractions. This is painful, so women are then offered and encouraged to have an epidural for pain relief. But epidurals slow contractions. Therefore she needs more pitocin to keep up the rate of contractions (and then needs another epidural…) The fluctuation between pitocin-induced contractions and epidural slowing contractions takes oxygen away from the baby, and too often results in “emergency” c-sections.


Since 1996 there has been a 46% increase in c-sections, s that by 2005 one in three births were c-sections. Additionally, it has been documented that c-sections peak at 4pm and 10pm -- when doctors are ready to go home before shift changes. The surgery is relatively simple on the part of the obstetrician, meaning that they’re less likely to be sued than in a traditional birth.


Why the lack of midwives? Answer one is that there is a lack of understanding what women in labor need (in the USA). The biggest reason though is that hospitals don’t like the competition -- therefore many insurance companies don’t like to want to pay midwives. This means midwives have to fight insurance companies for what is owed to them, and many go bankrupt. Midwives average 4 thousand for their services, while a hospital bill is often around thirteen thousand.



Food for thought --


Natural birth releases a huge cocktail of hormones and “love drugs,” helping a new mother to truly bond with her newborn. A c-section bypasses this, and no love hormone cocktail is released into the mother’s body. Does this screw up one in three kids later?


Also, do labor and delivery drugs fuck with infants? In previous studies with formerly used drugs there were side effects later in life for these babies. For now, and this round of drugs, there are no conclusive answers yet.


Links:





Wednesday, September 9, 2015

[cranky] the boy's club that is my job






I've worked in the theatre production business since before I could legally be paid to be there. I started in community theatre, worked on every middle and high school production I could get my hands on, and created my own major in college to continue this work. Primarily, I'm a theatre electrician and lighting designer. Occasionally I work as a production manager, and previously as a stage manager. Since it's been over ten years I can do a little bit of everything, and I've even taught professional development classes for middle and high school teachers. I've done lighting design for local professional dance companies, symphonies, musicals, and graduations, as well as college musicals. Six years ago the minimum I was ever paid was $15 an hour. Right now I'm thrilled to get any gig working for less pay.


There is an international theatre union, IATSE (declining to share my local’s number and rat myself out…). While I live in a right to work state, we follow most union rules and are all treated the same. Except that I've discovered that the "girls get less work calls" rumor is actually the truth. Guys with years less experience than me are getting more work offers than I am. Guys with a much smaller knowledge base are getting more work than I am. Therefore, they do make more money than me.


Recently I found out that there was a huge work call at my local arena for a famous rapper on tour. A friend of mine that I helped get into my city's theatres was asked to do the show, so he dropped a previous commitment I helped him get so he could go do the union-run concert with "his boys" (his words). So not only was I embarrassed, I found out that the union preference is having a penis over having the most experience or hardest work ethic. What other evenings am I at home, bored, ready and eager to work, and not getting a call because I have a vagina and can't grow a caveman beard?

Saturday, September 5, 2015

[fat] confessions on my own scars, stretch marks, and hairiness

giangie.tumblr.com


My first surgery scars came in high school from putting my shoulder back together after a weird overuse accident. (labral tear-- the tissue that holds the ball and socket in place was torn from the bone) After being misdiagnosed for eight months the three one-inch-long scars felt like battle scars. A year later I had a breast reduction, three pounds and some drainage tubes later I’ve got almost two feet of faint pink scars. I have yet to meet a man who noticed my scars until about a month of pillow talk later… it’s been quite the confidence booster. My other surgery scars are from having my appendix plucked out a few years after that. The scars are consistent with an ovary removal, but luckily it was my appendix that was infected and dying instead. The surgical scars could almost count as battle scars -- except my belly and boobs have faced no trauma.


All along my arms and legs are bug bites. Ants and mosquitoes for the most part, but the occasional family of chiggers or no-see-ums will try to take up residence under a flip flop strap. Many bites have scabbed over, and some have finally left smooth purple discolorations. I haven’t shaved my legs in over four years -- thighs in over six. Luckily the hair is rather blonde and thin, so I don’t need to worry about shaving over bug bites and opening up scabs. I’ve also got my fair share of old scraped knees and shins from work as well as my years of tree climbing and mud pie pancake making in the back yard. Additionally, no guy has noticed my leg hair until I've actually pointed it out to him. Women on occasion have noticed the leg hair.


Tuesday, September 1, 2015

[cranky] CFF manifesto (in progress)

CFF began as a way for me to post images and articles that spoke to me, without the anger of friend’s parents, or friends, or my parents and relatives, or any other jackasses. It was a way to share the new blog I had started, to contemplate my understanding of the feminist classes I was taking in college. I also needed to reflect on my recent return from Africa, and how feminism related to my trip.


CFF became a place for me to understand that there is more than fat shaming -- there is skinny shaming too, and that I’ve participated in it. Today, I do post mostly about fat shaming, but I make a point of never skinny shaming.


I’ve also reflected a lot on how I’ve felt fat since probably the age of 9 or 10. I hit puberty early (period came at age 10) so I was extra tall and hairy early. I’ve always had wide shoulders, and by 6th grade I was a 36C. I was always bigger than every other girl, and most of the guys. I told myself constantly that I was fat. Middle school (the years of self hate, mean girls, exploring make up, leg shaving, girl on girl hate…) only made my fat feel fatter.